ethereal arch

My last two rolls of film came out dusty and blurred.

xo

coyote

has played his first big trick, rendering me sheepish and contrite. Sheesh.

xo

what is next?

I wonder. Trying to keep my schedule devoid of plans is trying me these days. I didn't realize how tightly I cling to future ventures. So where does that leave me? With what is NOW!! xo

creepy sheep

need I say more?

(they were actually quite sweet)

xo

dear grammy

 wishing you peace and a joyful return home. I love you very much. 

xo

unslumping yourself

is not easily done. xo

another

special boat. xo

transit

through the grey. xo

I am not religious

But I sure do like churches. It's the idea of a sacred space that I like, and the architecture. Sometimes I check the doors if I happen to be walking by, they are usually locked.  So I do my reflecting in a coffee shop instead. xo

Does anyone

else love graveyards as much as I do? Greeni and I stumbled across one last January 9th and took a quiet look. First headstone we read? It belonged to Olivia, and it was her birthday. So we toasted to her all night. xo

A beautiful tangle

Rang in the new year at shi shi beach via magic tea, tide-racing on glassy sand, old friends and deep currents. I tackled the slick untangling of this kelp knot for a hot minute. There are too many metaphors here for words, but damn ain't it gorgeous? xo

I am

aware of being a seasonal creature. In the winter I am sedate. I sleep long, drink coffee and gain weight. Best of all? I'm learning to savor this.

How do you change?

xo

my film

survived the airport scanners, BIG SIGH (relief). This glorious tree lives just outside the house of the mom of a friend of Scott. She gave me an owl feather and a hug when we stopped in one time. 

I am busy busy preparing for the next chapter, which will include wild driftwood beaches, a island sheep farm and retreat. xo

arrival

Drove in and out of the fog all morning to reach Seattle by way of roadside hawks (over twenty!) Last night? Slinky lynx, bright eyed possum and a teeniest gravel mouse, frazzled. 

Nicole says it's important to fully arrive in a new place and I agree. For me, this has evolved to involve tea time, toothbrushing and an essential oil boost at a cozy cafe. 

Grateful for a generous dollar from a stranger, and my old room offered up by a friend.

xo

quantum physics

teaches us that a particle behaves like a wave, is able to be in two places at once and acts differently when watched. This I can get behind.  xo

hooray!

One of my photos was picked for a plastic camera show in sf, I think this is the one they want..... yay :) xo

manifest!

I've been journaling steadily since junior high, which is about 17 years. Seventeen years, whoa! I still remember how that exalting jolt of freedom felt as I realized I could write... ANYTHING I WANTED. And so I wrote and wrote and wrote.

After trekking a hefty stack out to the temple last year, I gained a new appreciation for the weight of my words. I started a ceremony of burning those pages, but not before a final sift-through, a hopeful unearthing of patterns and gems amongst the soot.

Sometime several months ago I stopped keeping a journal completely. And this was a new kind of freedom; an experiment in honing my tools and clearing the field for new growth. It's been fun to see what themes have persisted, for I still write (about dreams and synchronicities and gratefuls, recipes and notes on the exquisite mundane).

And today I've got manifesting on the brain. For perhaps my favorite part of reading through old words has been watching my lists of wants turn into reality (and always in the most roundabout and unexpected of ways!)

So? In the spirit of putting it out there, here are some rough wants, options perhaps, for the next 6 months.

1. Work trade on a farm
2. A short term nanny gig
3. A cozily temporary cabin, loft, shack, tipi or room
4. Photography show
5. Learn carpentry or cobb house construction.
6. A reason and the means to go to India
7. Regular yoga and meditation
8. Visits with creatures
9. Sustainable candida freedom

I would gleefully live in an old barn

or in a tipsy tower

xo

escape

Do you ever have the feeling of repeating old patterns, yet seem unable to change them? Been kind of a debbie downer lately, maybe due to the changing weather, lengthening nights and uncertainty about the future. I always come back to the phrase "gleeful anticipation" when things are so unsure, a mantra for infusing magic and curiosity into my outlook. Gratefuls help too (colorful yoga studios, patterns and shadows, long hallways with wood floors, and safe returns) x

playing the waiting game

While fending off worry and anger with yoga and wandering. Oh how I hate this game! xo

“Do you have the patience to wait until your mud settles, and the water is clear? Can you remain unmoving until the right action arises by itself?” ~ Lao-tzu

I've been yearning for those crispy cozy autumn days for months, and here in sf it tastes of spring. xo